Homeless Ambition

This story picks up where the other left off.

As I walked North on Park Ave. at 2 AM yesterday morning, black garbage bags of trash were coming out of the shops in hoards.  When I saw the restaurants doing this, it got me thinking.  Maybe I could reduce some of the waist, and at the same time save money and fill my stomach.   In a grocery store I saw a worker tying up two bags.   I made my way in.  "Is this food?"  "Yes."  "Are you going to throw it away?"  "Well we are going to put it in a room."  "Then what?"  "Then I think it goes to the dump."  Busted.  I asked if I could take the food, and she went to go get her manager who said that it's not allowed, but he would go put it outside, then a few minutes later I could go grab them so it was off the camera.  I thanked him.  The bags each weighed 30 pounds, but I didn't care, I just hit the jackpot!   And I had a plan.

After I woke up, I stashed the bags in the bushes while I went to town.  When I came back the squirrel lady was there with her peanuts, hooping and whistling.  I felt like it would destroy her world if I hopped the fence and grabbed the bags, so I waited until she left.  They were filled with soups, and pastas, and salads.  I downed a butternut squash soup and took to the city.

Since I've been in New York I've seen many homeless lying on the sidewalks (including a few older women.) I did some research and learned that in New York "in 2013, there [was] an all-time record 53,270 homeless people, including 12,701 homeless families with 22,625 homeless children." (coalitionforthehomeless.org)  So I decided to carry the food around and meet some of them.  Soon, I realized my arms could not sustain carrying these bags, so I went into CVS pharmacy and asked the clerk if I could borrow a cart with wheels.  She called the manager, I told him my idea, and that I could leave my wallet or a license.  He didn't hesitate to say yes.

So imagine a tall white kid walking down the street with a big backpack and a little red cart with tiny black wheels that would get stuck in ruts trailing behind him filled with garbage bags.  I couldn't help but laugh when I saw my reflection.

I saw a man with a cart, apparently, homeless dusting off a car, so I went to him and asked, "sir, are you hungry?  I've got a bunch of food here."  He said, "I'm good."  I asked him if he knew where I could find people that would want food.  He flared up, "I SAID, I'M GOOD!"  "I'm really glad you're good," I said as I walked away.  I understood why he could be insulted, a suggestion that he doesnt have the capability of taking care of himself.  "Am I just going to be insulting everyone I interact with today?" I thought.  I decided that even if it was a complete bust it would be worth the time, because how else would I learn what the reality of the situation is?  Looking across the street, I could see a few CVS clerks clustered, and pointing out the window.  I laughed and gave them a big thumbs up.

A few blocks down I saw a store owner talking to a slouched man sitting in front of his shop.  It appeared the he was trying to get rid of the man.  But he was seemed too unaware of what happening to comprehend the demand.  After the shop owner left I came over to him and squatted.  He was trying to role a cigarette with a small pinch of tobacco.  "What's you're name?"  "Maaw," he mumbled.  When I asked him if he wanted food he muttered something that I took for a yes, so I handed him some mashed potatoes and corn.  His eyes lit up, and he handed me the haphazard cigarette to show his gratitude.  "I don't smoke, but thanks. Can I take a picture with you?"  He nodded.

I walked for an hour before I found another homeless person.  He didn't look destitute, but he was digging through a dumpster.  He said his name was Spike.  He was excited when I asked him if he wanted food, and he took six dishes.  There was such sorrow in his eyes.  I wonder how his experience of reality is.  Has he experienced happiness?

(Then I happened upon the studio of a legend.)

The next man I asked was different, he had a sparkle in his eye.  He seemed more aware of the world around him.  After I left, I had an urge to go back and ask him what his life is like.  I stood there for a minute analyzing the situation in my mind before I went back and said, "I'm curious what you're life is like."  "Oh, life is good! God is good," he said.  "You seem happy."  He replied, "I am happy......I've learned that happiness is what you make it."  He continued, "You know, I get these visions, and when I follow through with them good things happen."  I meant to revisit this idea, but forgot as he told me about his life, how he used to have a house and a wife, but 5 years ago he lost everything.  "I don't blame anyone else, I've learned you have to take responsibility if you want to make things better, and I know how to make things better."  He told me that anyone can get out of the homeless position if they want.  The problem is that people are chasing the wrong thing.  They spend all day chasing food and clothes.  It's smarter to chase money that you can spend to buy food, then you can have a beer and a cigarette in the evening instead of continuing to chase food and clothes.  He was a positive guy to be around, a light countenance.  We hugged and said goodbye.

After passing out food to 4 or 5 more people, it started to rain.  At this point I was in Times Square, I passed a man that asked me for a donation to help feed the homeless.  He went through his shpeel, then I told him I'd fed about ten today.  "You're a good man," he said.  "If you want to drop the rest off at the Times Square church, they'll take it."  The interaction I had at the church was the coldest interaction of the day.  The guy obviously didn't want to talk to me, or take my food.  So I left.

As I left I saw a guy a few years younger than me with a nice afro asking for money.  I stopped and gave him some food.  He was really touched, and said smiling, "man, I remember like a year ago a man came by and gave me some food."  A year ago?  I sat next to him.  He told me his name was Jazz, and that he has big ambition, that's why he ends up on the streets sometimes because he risks a lot.  I asked him what his ambition was, and he said rapping.  "You wanna hear some?"  He said, eyes sparkling.  "Of course!"  He started free styling about how he was sitting there, why he was there, and about how I came to give him some food.  I wanted to film, and he was stoked about that.  Here's Jazz.  I love the end.

What a day.

This still isn't the introduction to my blog, but it is the 4th post.  Welcome.